Hello Beautiful Coffee People,
Like you, we were abruptly interrupted from our morning perusal of the New York Times’ weddings announcements by our personal assistants this weekend. We hate it when they sneak up on us like that–we were just getting to the part where Whitney and Ron bonded over “a mutual appreciation for sneakers, organizing their DVD collections alphabetically, and the latest technology gadgets and devices.” Will these two N.Y.U business school grads find romance? Now we’ll never know!
What important news demanded such a cruel interruption? It was this: Four Barrel just released a couple of new coffees. There, we said it. In fact, here it is in all-caps:
WE RELEASED NEW COFFEES. They're here on our Web site. Not the coffees themselves, but descriptions of them, and ways to buy them.
Oh, wait, there’s also this: Taste the Friendo Blendo. It is tasty. Like something that tastes good. Like the canapes that Jennifer and Colin enjoyed at their “rustic chic” wedding reception “glittering with crystal and china, a mix of urban chic and homespun charm” at their “sprawling resort” in Connecticut. Friendo's make-up is always posted plainly on this site, right by the other coffees.
What’s that? Oh yes, speaking of people we thought would never get together, Ms. Tayler Mehit has joined Mr. Hein & Brian Keeffe as Four Barrel wholesale liaisons. “It’s an unconventional marriage, but we’re dedicated to making it work,” she said. Ms. Mehit, 25, will continue to use her surname professionally.
Likewise, Mr. Trevor Hudson has ditched The Mill to join the 4B training & edukation krew. Say hello, Trevor. Good job. Say, could you bring our Sunday Times back over, and refill our bellinis? Bless you, dear.
Kimberly, a producer for Fox News, finally found Marcus, a VP for MasterCard, after dates with so many men who were “too phony, too old, too young or too incompatible.” Sing it, sister! We felt the same way, until we met Christian, cellar master of Monk's Kettle and Abbot's Cellar. He’s one of the many attractive experts who’ll join us for seminars and events to which you are invited. Yes, you. And a date, if you like. No pressure. Or you could just come cup with us, whenever it works for you. All our classes and events are listed somewhere on this Web site. The favor of an RSVP to firstname.lastname@example.org is requested.
Finally, we join Erin and Terence in admitting that “It’s tough trying to be professional” when one is as naturally attractive as we are. Still, we feel duty-bound to alert you to the impending holidays. We believe they're falling on Thursdays this year. The Four Barrel office will be closed, along with UPS & USPS… and of course if your place will be closed, we’d love to know. Text us! Let's all get together in late January!
Late January… that seems like a good time to release the hounds. No, we mean the coffees. Release the coffees. Expect even more new coffees for the new year. Save the date!